The letter (29/5/2012)

The letter that I wrote after being with you for the past 8 months but never gave to you . . .

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I can no longer picture a life without you by my side. Every wish I have nowadays is about us and a future together. You are my heart and soul. if you ever leave, life wouldnt be the same. I would lose my mind for a few months maybe then realise you might have just been a dream.

I am thankful and grateful that I've been fated tto be with you this long and maybe longer, hopefully forever. I'm missing you everyday and it would've killed me if my love for you wasnt strong enough to wake me up each morning. All my life, I've never met a guy like you. I never wanted to hold on to someone so badly. I would lay down my life for you. Thats how important you have become to me. I always thought I had a problem with commitment. i always felt that somehow, whenever i broke up with someone, it was because of who I am that they can't live with. You became the guy that I've been waiting for.

You are the one I want. You are the one I love. You are the one I can't live without. You are the one I need. When I'm with you, I feel loved. I feel safe. I feel like I'm at home. My heart is with you no matter where I am, no matter where you are. You are the part of me that makes me feel whole.

Knowing that you mean so much to me, scares me. All you need to do is leave or disappear and my life would fall apart. You're my everything. You could break me until i'm inconsoleable. People change all the time. It's natural and normal. Not knowing what is going to happen to us in the future scares me. I love you too much to lose you.

I go to sleep every night looking out my window wishing on a star that you will be mine forever. I'll never see a more beautiful night than the one I'll spend watching the stars with you, falling asleep in your arms. When I see you smilling, my heart flutters. When you kiss me, I feel like I'm flying. I would never want to miss a moment with you. In my heart, I know you're the love of my life I would never let go.
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Fate had different plans for us when I got back. This letter and my love was all that I had for you. You gave me countless letters and a folio/scrapbook of us. I know I've changed since I left to college. You just couldnt accept the difference.